Just look at this...
I mean, I think I'm ok at doing the style things.
Chinos and carrot legs, check.
Shit weasel beard. Check.
Angry unapproachable "I'm better than you" air of pompousness. Check
Skinny arse waist that makes people jealous so they tell me I need to eat but really they are thinking I wish my clothes hung like that. Check.
But this dude.. He's come along and ruined it all. He's mixed up his fashion and the outcome is disgustingly fabulous. I hate him for what he's done to
Mankind but I also love him a little bit for having the jabronies to go our looking so fetch. (It's a British thing.. It will catch on ANY DAY NOW*)
I mean skinny jeans I can live with but pink combat leggings? Why the fuck didn't I think of that. Damnit.
Also, will someone please please tell me where you can buy MEAT socks? What next, bacon hats? burger shoes? A cheese slice fucking tie?
We will literally eat ourselves to an early fashion themed death.
I think for summer I'm going to fight the power and wear some cords and a tank top.. Oh wait, nope the hipsters won't accept me either.
*it will NEVER catch on
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